June 2009
37 posts
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Vince Noir: C'mon, Howard, let's get out of here.
Howard Moon: Stop tugging at my mink!
Vince Noir: Mink? That's a bit off, isn't it? You're supposed to be a zookeeper.
Howard Moon: Yeah, well, it's a different law in the tundra, Vince. It's kill or be killed.
Vince Noir: What, by a mink?
Howard Moon: They get very big out here.
[gesturing at floor-length mink coat]
Howard Moon: This whole thing is just one mink.
Vince Noir: That's not right. I know, I read a pamphlet.
Howard Moon: So? I once glanced at a hedge. What's your point?
Vince Noir: No, it was a mink pamphlet. "Minky Monthly". There were millions of them on the front, dancing around. It said that it takes about ninety mink just to make a small ladies glove.
Howard Moon: That's 'cause they're really crap at sewing
The Moon: One time, I saw a man looking at me, yes, with his eyes. And then, he, he picked up a tube. And he looked, in the tube, and he made the moon big, inside the tube. The moon big inside a tube!
[laughs]
Howard Moon: I’m an explorer.
Vince Noir: I thought you were a writer?
Howard Moon: I do many things. I span the genres - they call me the genre spanner.
Vince Noir: Yeah, they call you the spanner…
Vince Noir: Seriously though, you should check out my icey wardrobe.
Howard Moon: What, the human Coke can?
Vince Noir: This is the glam rock ski suit!
Howard Moon: The arctic has no respect for fashion, Vince. You know, never take the tundra lightly. It can drive a man insane. You know what it is about this place, that gets people mad? Vince Noir: Not really.
Howard Moon: Have a look through there, what do you see?
Vince Noir: [looks through binoculars] Nothing.
Howard Moon: Exactly. It’s the nothingness… the whiteness… the endless… ness. Stretching on beyond the human imagination. Desolation of the soul. Oh my Gooooooooooood! [raps] Howard Moon: Ice flow, nowhere to go / Ice flow, nowhere to go / Lost in the blinding whiteness of the tundraaaaaa / Check him out. [Vince dances]
Howard Moon: They call him the shrew! Arms in short, then with the claw! Vince Noir: I’m little Johnny Frostbite, moving around / Freezing you up, freezing you down / Like an icicle / Coming in your tent in the pink light, scissorbite/
Vince Noir, Howard Moon: Arctic death! Vince Noir: Infinite night!
Howard Moon: Call me Tundra Boy / Cause I move like an arctic
Vince Noir, Howard Moon: Lizard!
Howard Moon: When the blizzard strikes / I disappear like a pipe dream
Vince Noir, Howard Moon: All that’s left is the gleam!
Howard Moon: On a tent peg
Vince Noir, Howard Moon: Boosh, Boosh / Stronger than a moose / Don’t lock your door or we’ll come through your rooftop / Stop, look around, take your mind off the flow / Cause the Boosh is loose / And we’re a little bit raaaaw! /Ice flow, nowhere to go / Ice flow, nowhere to go / Lost in the blinding whiteness of the tundraaaa!
Howard Moon: …yeah?
Vince Noir: All right! Proved your point, in song format!
Howard Moon: Yeah, well maybe you’ll take this place a bit more seriously now. [gets hit in the face with a snowball]
Isolation - Mighty Boosh Season 2